At the core of the self-care movement is the need to renew your spirit, to choose activities—or a complete lack thereof—that help you feel both relaxed and rejuvenated. Self-care is ultimately about taking a pause to do what you need to to be happier, calmer, and healthier. And no matter what products you buy or things you do, it’s crucial to remember that self-care is an individualized experience. What benefits you mentally and physically may not be the same for your best friend or colleague or partner. We asked mental health experts and coaches to explain the dos and don’ts of creating a self-care routine that’s for you—and only you. Torres-Mackie says that your self-care choices should leave you feeling nourished, energized, and ready to tackle whatever comes next. All too often, she notes, people get into the doing-and-producing mode and then start to see self-care as yet another to-do list item. To determine what works for you, Torres-Mackie suggests the cognitive-behavioral technique of imagining experiences in detail ahead of time. “When you’re considering what you need at the moment to feel good, imagine yourself doing it and how you will feel after,” she says. “If it’s filled up, then go for it. If it’s depleted, skip it.” When we make these excuses for ourselves, we aren’t reaping the real benefits, since they provide instant gratification without a long-lasting impact. Instead, Kennedy says self-care should be about creating a little breathing room to come back to the task or problem with more mental resources to handle it: “We [should] use self-care to make sure we are well-equipped to handle the stresses of life, as opposed to avoiding them.” RELATED: 9 Unhealthy Coping Habits That End Up Hurting More Than Helping To begin reframing how you picture it, correct yourself when you start to feel guilty for doing an activity that fulfills you—like reading a book for 30 minutes. Instead, list all of the reasons you’ll be a better partner, friend, mother, daughter, and so on by taking the time you need. RELATED: How to Practice Self-Care on a Budget One way to make it more manageable is to build short breaks throughout your day, so you keep yourself accountable for intentional pauses, says Ellen Yin, the founder and podcast host of “Cubicle to CEO.” Yin recommends scheduling yourself an actual lunch: eat away from your computer or block out 10 minutes for a walk up and down the street. “Some of our best thinking happens in the pause, and self-care doesn’t have to be extravagant or complicated,” she continues. “If you can’t take two weeks off, take two minutes off, multiple times a day.”
Am I sleeping poorly? Am I eating well? Am I craving unhealthy foods? Am I grinding my teeth? Do I feel body aches?
As you answer these, you can narrow down potential solutions for what’s irking you. Maybe it’s a nap, a long stretching session, or testing out a new recipe while listening to a podcast. RELATED: 20 Micro (Yet Mighty) Self-Care Challenges That’ll Make Any Day Better
